Weight Loss and Time Travel

So, I'm still mostly eating the Seattle Sutton Healthy Eating (SSHE)(TM)(Ph.D)(ASAP)(Do wah diddy) program. Sure, there are a bunch of meals that I just--ha! Can you believe it--don't actually eat because WE WENT OUT TO EAT! Or, like last weekend, we spent the weekend on the boat and I can't cook on the boat until we put in an inverter. . .and you don't care, but really, these are GOOD EXCUSES.

ANYWAY.

So, I finally lost my first 10 pounds, which is more than I have lost at any time in the last 19 years, so yeah. It's a big deal. But the weird thing is that I don't think of weight as actual numbers anymore. (Which is convenient, because now I don't have to tell you what I really weigh! Score!) Instead, I think of weight as related to the times in my life I actually weighed those amounts.

Okay, so that wasn't at all clear. Here is what I mean. I stood on the scale the other day, and saw HEY! I've lost 10 pounds! And my next thought was: Hey! I only need to lose one more pound and I'll weigh what I did three years ago, when Capt. Sweetie and I spent a honeymoon in San Francisco!

So, does that mean that if I lose one measly pound I also lose three years off my age? Damn straight it does.

So then, all these other times come back to me. If I lose 10 pounds after that, I'll weigh what I did when I had that emotional breakdown in my therapists office about how the depression was killing me and . . .

Okay, let's not focus on that one.

Let's focus on the next major goal! The weight I was when I got pregnant with each of my wonderful little girls! Which is (yes, I am bragging) the exact same weight I was when I left the hospital after the birth of my girls! It wasn't baby weight, it was the weight I gained after I had the babies that I'm working on now.

Or, a mere 8 pounds after that, and I'm the weight I was when my sister, the Fabulous Suefunky, got married. That was a good time! Plus, then I get to subtract all 10 of those years!

After that, I get to go all the way back to what I weighed when I was 25 years old! Take that, Dorian Gray!