Sunday, May 11, 2008

This May Explain World War II

Today the Bunny was confirmed. She's on the young age of the confirmation class, but it's not a large church, so they only hold confirmation class about once every three years. Yes, it is also Mothers' Day, but that happens every year, so today we celebrated her.

As the Special Person Of The Day, Bunny got to pick where she wanted to go for lunch after church. She started studying German this year, and is all but obsessed with all things Deutsch. So we went to lunch at the Black Forest Inn, a German restaurant in Minneapolis that is a fixture, having been there for over 45 years.

I have not been to this restaurant before, nor have I much experience with German food. It seems to involve a lot of sauerkraut, which is as vile a concoction as was ever passed off as food. Do you know how you make sauerkraut? Basically, you shred cabbage, put it in a crock with vinegar, and let it sit for about six months. And then you give it to somebody else to eat, because after living around fermenting cabbage for six months YOU aren't going to eat it.

So it was with some trepidation that I viewed the menu. They have a few American items, hamburgers, chicken strips, french fries. But the point was to eat something German, so I looked at the traditional menu.

If there is one thing common to the German specialties served at the Black Forest, it is MEAT. Usually veal or pork, some beef, and liver if you want it. You can get meat wrapped up in cabbage leaves, meat in gravy over noodles, meat rolled up into balls and fried, meat left on the bone. Carnivorous, this cuisine is.

But you can add just about anything that isn't a healthy green vegetable to your meat, as long as you like it soaked in vinegar or brown (meat) gravy. Lots of cabbage too.

So as I read this menu, I began reassessing German culture. What do you make of a culture that eats nothing but meat and vinegar soaked rotten cabbage? This must be one testy population--probably digestively challenged and gastricly irritated. No wonder they invaded France--probably looking for something edible.

And then. . .

The house specialty drinks.

Infused vodkas. Vodkas infused with. . .

horseradish.

This is a diet for warriors!

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