Friday, May 19, 2006

More New Toys!

I am such a spoiled girl! Really! Because I got a great new toy--my new cel phone.

It is tres slim!

It is beaucoup sleek!
Eh bien, it is..comment on dit?... it is pink!

The phone is pink.

The carrying case is pink.

The automobile charger is pink.

The Bluetooth earpiece is pink!

Plus, all the pinks are shiny pink!

However, none of the currently programmed ringtones are by Pink. You'd think that would have been a gimme.

Gittin' Bloggy wit da NYT

Total cultural geek that I am, I get the New York Times movie and book reviews delivered to my email. Today come the long awaited, oft-delayed review of The DaVinci Code, and readers, it was worth the wait.

Not the movie, silly. The review.

Who knew that the Gray Lady would sink to being snarky? Can one even be snarky when you have to refer to everybody and Mr. or Ms.?

Apparently you can. And A.O. Scott did.

I wish I had written these lines:

He [Tom Hanks character] is summoned to the crime scene by Bezu Fache, a French policeman who seems very grouchy, perhaps because his department has cut back on its shaving cream budget.

...albino monk, whose name is Silas and who may be the first character in the history of motion pictures to speak Latin into a cellphone...

Through it all Mr. Hanks and Ms. Tautou stand around looking puzzled, leaving their reservoirs of charm scrupulously untapped.

...not even a glimmer of eroticism flickers between the two stars. Perhaps it's just as well. When a cryptographer and a symbologist get together, it usually ends in tears.

I will give Mr. Brown this much: he's good at names. If I ever have twins or French poodles, I'm calling them Bezu and Teabing for sure.

Mon dieu! Ze movie, it is merde, but the reviews sure are fun to read!

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Fashion is a Cruel Mistress

Mr. Sweetie and I were headed somewhere after church last week, and had to stop for some gas. In front of us at another pump was an Asian woman in what had to be a red Corvette. She was dressed up in a black suit with knee length gauchos and some really rocking black and white pumps.

As an avid fan of Go Fug Yourself, I was trying to imagine what Jessica and Heather would say about this outfit. I imagined they would be as dismayed at the return of gaucho pants as I am, but would heartily endorse the shoes as cute, if a bit too white to wear with the dark suit.

So there I was, having an imaginary conversation with my invisible internet friends, when the woman turned around. She was wearing her suit jacket over...


Absolutely nothing.

No, I lie. There was a shoestring running between the sides of the jacket, presumably to keep the whole thing from flying open in the spring breeze.

It was an outfit that you might expect Mariah Carey to wear at an awards show, to assure that her presence was noticed. Not what you usually see in Lutheran Land on a Sunday morning, where our breasts stay inside from the cold. I can only imagine the discomfort of wearing a shoulder belt.

Too Much Information

Last night the Bunny got caught up in watching something on TV, and could only make a bathroom run during the commercial. She ran past me, muttering to her self "Oh, bladder. Oh, bladder. My bladder is experiencing difficulty."

I'm betting on at least a 780 on her Verbal SATs.

OMG! It's Beautiful!

Now we are really grown-ups. Today our furniture arrived from the Swanky Furniture Store. MAN it's great.

This was the great leap of faith--this was where we had to trust in our ability to accurately imagine large pieces of furniture based on small photographs and fabric swatches.

Coupled with our faith in the ability of a paint sample to accurately match the fabric swatch once the paint was on the wall.

But we did! It does! Even the dog likes it!

And in the nick of time too--Mr. Sweetie's mother comes to visit tomorrow.