Is Irony Dead? Or, The USAToday-ification of America

Just so you don't think that I'm entirely disconnected from the world--I was reading the paper today. Well, not the NEWSpaper so much as the Sunday extras.

Okay, okay, I admit it! I started my morning with the trashy glossy USAWeekend insert. You know, the one with the Golden Globes as the cover story and the fake celebrity gossip questions on the first page. (Dear USAWeekend. I have always loved [insert name of celebrity with movie/tv series/release from rehab to promote] and I always thought he/she/it was never appreciated. Does he/she/it have a new movie coming out? When will we see a reunion of "Welcome Back Kotter?")

Hah! But that's not all they have. You thought this was just a trashy celebrity obsessed rag! But you are wrong! USAWeekend also covers medical breakthroughs (lose weight by eating less and exercising more!) AND Important Safety Information! (To avoid hotel theft: lock your door!)

Not only that, but they have an ENTIRE page--one with NO ADS AT ALL- devoted to SCIENCE! That's right--scientific developments are important to the USAWeekend audience. Just look at the headline today!

Newly Charted Territory: With the discovery of a new "planet" in our solar system, some people may wonder: Will this affect my horoscope?

That's right! With the recent discovery of a field of objects outside the bounds of Pluto's orbit, scientists are raising new questions about the nature of the solar system, and whether Taureans are REALLY ruled by Venus.

I'm predicting that the scientists at JPL are going to have to start reassigning computing time for this.