Sunday, September 14, 2008

The Death Knell

Have you noticed how everybody even slightly famous seems to have a clothing line these days? Sarah Jessica Parker has Bitten, Madonna is at H&M, P. Diddy has Sean John, David Arquette (David effin' Arquette? Who died and left him behind as a style icon?) is starting one. All the cool kids have them too--Eminem, Snoop Dogg, Kanye West, 50 Cent. . .the list goes on and on.

So really, it should be no surprise that LL Cool J has a line as well. Actually, it is apparently this third line of clothing, after FUBU and Todd Smith. I was kind of surprised to hear about this latest one, however, since I haven't heard ANYTHING about ole LL since about 1989. While he's been making cds and acting and writing books since then, none of that ever showed up on my radar.

Hence, this latest effort has a decided whiff of desperation about it:

LL Cool J, exclusively at Sears.

Sears? SEARS? WTF? I mean, Sears has negative cool. Sears sells house paint! And lawn mowers! And tool boxes! I mean, if ever a store embodied dead white suburban dads of the 1950s, it would have to be Sears. If somebody cool went into a Sears, we'd experience a cool/anti-cool implosion that would rip the space time continuum.

Sears.

Huh.

Good luck with that.

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