Thursday, April 20, 2006

PMS = Punish Men Severely?

The husband of a friend of mine made this acronym--that PMS stands for Punish Men Severely. Of course, that's not true, because then it would be all about the guys, when we all know it's all about...ME.

Which is to say that at least there is a medical explanation about why I looked into my closet today and found ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to wear. So, of course, I had to put something on to wear for just long enough for me to go buy something new. It is, in fact, a medical expense that ought to be covered as a drug benefit--do not laugh: retail therapy will become recognized as a non-experimental regimen which alleviates many of the symptoms of PMS.

Along with chocolate--thank goodness we had extra Easter candy around this week--and the rum and diet Cokes (caffeine free) that I was craving all week. At least there is a medical explanation for my unassuageable cravings.

So, what does PMS stand for? Try these:

Pour Me S'moretequila (slur these together--it's how it sounds anyway)
Purchase More Shoes
Provide Many Snacks
Prolonged Money Spending

Operators are standing by to take your suggestions and to tally your preferences. As they say in Chicago: Vote Early And Often!

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